Eh, congratulations?
So, yesterday, I emailed the guy I consider to be my best friend about coming with me to the Diamondbacks Dodgers game this coming Friday (I got some tickets for a suite), and the email I got back was:
Thanks for the invitation, but I have to pass. We are expecting a baby in November so I have some projects that need to be completed this weekend. I hope you guys are doing well.
WTF!?!?
Turns out they’re due in the beginning of November, which puts them about 8 months along. Seriously? And we somehow didn’t get the note? This guy was my best man at my wedding, and was my best friend all through college. I dated his wife’s roommate through most of school as well. He and his wife now live fifteen minutes from me.
I was so peeved. How do you not give someone who is a close friend that information? Either that, or I’m considerably farther down the friendship scale than I think.
September 19th, 2007 at 10:58 pm
Oh man…Even if my old lady (if I had one) was having the baby that day I’d go to a baseball game if I got to go for A.) Free B.) The seats are in a suite….This guy is obviously mentally retarded…
September 20th, 2007 at 5:22 am
Hello… just seeing if I can leave a comment.
September 20th, 2007 at 5:23 am
Hoorah! At last. Right then, here we go.
I’ve watched a lot of my friends have babies and trust me, it does weird stuff to people.
Don’t be offended, some people are HYPER sensitive about telling anyone… others are like one of my friends, who was so laid back that despite our being in regular contact by phone and e-mail throughout her pregnancy, actually forgot to mention she was pregnant - we tend to talk about fairly abstract stuff though.
When it comes to the ticket, it sounds to me like his Mrs is a High Maintenance girl who is having a High Maintenance pregnancy and he is totally under the thumb. It may sound like the guy is certifiably insane but remember the line from Good Will Hunting? Perhaps he, too, has to miss the game to “Go see about a girl…” His girl in this case.
I’d phone him, say you understand about the game are delighted to hear he’s going to be a dad and that way you can easily slip in a casual ask as to why they didn’t tell you. Remember, if they’ve been trying a while or think you have, they might have been trying to spare your feelings - maybe they wanted to wait until they saw you and haven’t had the chance to meet up. There’s loads of reasons why they might not have said, all completely illogical but in my experience (limited I grant you ;-)) nobody thinks straight when they are about to have kids.
I can understand why you’re upset and I hope the reasons turn out to be… well… um… reasonable!
Cheers
BC
September 20th, 2007 at 7:01 am
I did tell him congratulations in my follow up email, and I meant it. It just seemed strange that it was never mentioned when we’ve been in contact, oh, any time this year. This is his second child. I think. Who knows.
We’re going to have lunch tomorrow, so I’ll see it I can weasel it out of him.
September 20th, 2007 at 7:01 am
Have you spoken to him in the past 8 months?
September 20th, 2007 at 8:49 am
Mostly over email, but we have spoken a couple of times over the phone.
September 20th, 2007 at 8:56 am
That is strange behavior. Unless he’s all superstitious and didn’t tell anyone. Or maybe second child is not big news in his book. Wtf do I know about baby-having psychology. I’ll keep it simple and stick to my first sentence.
September 20th, 2007 at 9:02 am
I would be offended, probably. I’ve actually had some stuff happen similar to that but on a much smaller scale.
September 20th, 2007 at 9:08 am
I don’t know. Maybe they’re having issues with this pregnancy, or are just overwhelmed by the thought of another one, who knows. All I know is that if I wandered into his wife in the grocery store I wouldn’t have been able to hide my offense like I did over email.
I guess I’ll know more tomorrow.
September 20th, 2007 at 11:51 am
Weird man. Does he not read this blog or something? Cause if he does, he’s sure to figure it out soon enough.
September 20th, 2007 at 12:07 pm
Nobody I know in real life knows about this blog. It’s my own private playground.
It’s pretty freeing.
September 20th, 2007 at 12:51 pm
No doubt it’s freeing. I don’t think I could get away with doing a blog like that. I don’t know if I would want to either, I rely on the people I know to create material, and it wouldn’t feel right to be if I was posting all this stuff about them and they didn’t know it.
Besides, if I don’t like somebody, they know it, so there aren’t to many secrets I can keep in that sense.
September 20th, 2007 at 1:45 pm
Eh, I know it’s only temporary. I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off permanently. I don’t think I could ever make a good part-time spy.
Full time, now that I could pull off.
That’s also why I very seldom say anything on here that I wouldn’t/haven’t said in real life. Degrees of separation, and all that. Eventually my Spiderman and Peter Parker worlds will collide, and I’ll have to fess up. But I’ll never give up the suit.
September 20th, 2007 at 1:50 pm
I know what you mean. My only option is to live like Night Crawler, because there is no way I could trick people into thinking I’m NOT a mutant. I don’t mean that literally, but I can’t think of a superhero that doesn’t have an alter-ego besides him.
September 21st, 2007 at 9:13 am
Joe,
At least he had the decency to take care of his wife since she was about to deliver in a month. My husband’s best friend’s wife was due to deliver in 3 weeks and he took my husband on trip to Mexico for a week because his wife couldn’t travel her last month of pregnancy. Unbelievable.
September 21st, 2007 at 1:17 pm
if you have talked to him it’s really wierd that he wouldn’t have mentioned it..
September 22nd, 2007 at 1:03 pm
People can have their children all they want if they must, but mess with my social calendar? That’s just murder.
Makes me think, though, the best friends I have, I guess, are the ones you could not see for months, but when you do, it’s as if nothing’s changed.
This is definitely strange. That reply reminds me of a job rejection, not of a friend who’s sorry he can’t attend.
Chux.